I got this e-mail and thought I'd share it here. 
1. If you are choking on an ice cube simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat. Presto! The blockage will  instantly remove itself.
2. Avoid cutting yourself slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold while you chop.
3. Avoid arguments  with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by using the sink.
4. For high blood pressure sufferers: simply cut yourself and bleed for a few  minutes, thus reducing the pressure in your veins. Remember to use a timer.
5. A mouse trap, placed on top of your alarm clock, will  prevent you from rolling over and going back to sleep after you hit the  snooze button.
6. If you have a bad cough, take a large dose  of laxatives, then you will be afraid to cough.
7. You only need two  tools in life - WD-40 and Duct Tape. If it doesn't move and should, use the  WD-40. If it shouldn't move and does, use the duct tape.
8. Remember: Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
Daily  Thought: SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES. NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT  THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE  STAIRS.
Thursday, November 29, 2007
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